The case filed by the SEC last week against Geoffrey H. Lunn and two other individuals for an alleged fraud called the ".44 Magnum Leveraged Financing Program" is one of those where you can't help but shake your head as you read it. In fact, I defy you to not go into full "smh" mode, as your teenager would put it, while you read through these alleged facts. 

Just to set the tone for what is to come below, let me tell you Lunn's explanation for his alleged actions. Lunn testified that a one-eyed man using an alias, and whose true identity and whereabouts remain unknown, threatened to kill him and his family if he did not cooperate in the scheme. 

Now that we have that out of the way, here is what the SEC alleges:

1. In 2010 and 2011, Lunn portrayed himself to investors as the vice president of a (fictitious) company called "Dresdner Financial," a firm whose executives supposedly had connections to "Dresdner Bank." Dresdner Bank was formerly one of Germany's largest banks, but was merged out of existence in mid-2009.

2. Lunn and two other individuals (Darlene Bishop and Vincent Curry) solicited investors throughout the U.S. and in several foreign countries for their ".44 Magnum Leveraged Financing Program," which they "100% guaranteed" could turn an investment of just $44,000 into $2 million within 10 to 12 banking days. 

3. The money "Dresdner Financial" received from investors was never used for any investment purpose, but was rather simply withdrawn by Lunn. Lunn paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to himself, Bishop and Curry, and also gave at least $848,500 to three Las Vegas call girls he met so that they could have "a better type of life." Lunn also made a $1 million payment to one favored investor who he thought "was a deserving person."

4. In his SEC testimony, Lunn admitted that his scheme "was a con, basically." He added that the ".44 Magnum" scheme was actually created by a "one-eyed man" using the alias Robert Perello who supposedly told Lunn that the program got its name because "when people found out they'd been ripped off, they would buy a .44 Magnum and shoot themselves in the head."